i am finally home, finally snuggled up to where i am supposed to be with who i am supposed to be with. i know i am meant to go away again, to find the life i am probably meant to have; however i still find myself debating between what i really feel or want. i am supposed to enjoy the small things in life, and relax and laugh and fly by the seat of my pants, but those things seem to become more distant as each day passes. some days are better than others, and there are usually some parts of every day that are better than other parts, but i still look at other people and wonder how they do it - how do they enjoy walking, enjoy the snow, enjoy relaxing inside with a movie? i dont remember how to enjoy those things in the same way that i used to, and i am confused and sad about it a lot of the time. but, i am trying - we are trying together - and i hope that one day everything will click, everything will make sense.
" not all who wander are lost"
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